Monday, September 12, 2011

5 Reasons Why I Don't Date

1. Motives
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves." --Philippians 2:3
In dating relationships, a person often goes into the relationship thinking of what they will get out of it (e.g. He/she makes me feel happy/attractive/needed etc.) Dating becomes a means of obtaining status, security, popularity or fun. However, the bible tell us we are not to use other people to build ourselves up, but to humble ourselves and build others up!

2. Accountability
"Abstain from all appearance of evil." --1 Thessalonians 5:22
The bible instructs us to flee sexual immorality and every appearance of evil so that unbelievers will give glory to God (1 Cor 6:18, 1 Peter 2:12). Because we are imitators of Christ, whatever we do reflects back on Him. Unfortunately, most accountability standards for dating are very low. When couples go to secluded places by themselves, it leaves the door open for temptations and ruined reputations.

3. Guarding Our Hearts
"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." --Proverbs 4:23
Women in particular can become emotionally attached very rapidly in a dating relationship and if/when the relationship ends, their heart inevitably becomes damaged. The illustration of a paper heart has been used where a piece is torn off and given to every man that comes along. By the time a woman gets married, there is almost nothing left to give to her husband. Saving emotional purity is just as important as saving the physical.

4. Practice for Divorce
"Treat younger men as brothers...and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity." --1 Timothy 5:1b-2
Dating is often compared to taking a car out for a test drive. If you don't like the way it handles, you can simply take another one for a spin. If couples view relationships as dissolvable partnerships that can be abandoned when rough spots are encountered, it creates a mentality of impermanence and infidelity that sets them up for a bad marriage. Furthermore, this attitude is no way to treat our brothers and sisters-in-Christ.

5. Distraction
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the sun." --Ecclesiastes 3:1
If a dating relationship is commenced at the wrong time, with the wrong person or is pursued in the wrong manner, it can become a distraction that pulls us away from God. When making important decisions in life, we should always consult the will of God before our own desires.

*Note: I am not claiming that every dating relationship is morally wrong and displeasing to God. There are many happy marriages that have resulted from healthy dating relationships. I am basing this post solely on my observations and personal biblical studies.


Chelsearae said...

Right on :) Thanks for the reminder!

Catherine said...

To the tell the truth, I wrote it because I needed the reminder too! :)